I turned 50 this month. 50! Five decades. Half a century. Approximately 18,262 days on Planet Earth. It’s the sort of milestone that makes a gal take pause. And in that pause I guess it’s only natural to start looking back, to contemplate what I’ve done with those 18,000 odd days that have been gifted to me, and to consider where my journey has taken me.
As I thought about those five decades I came to the conclusion that I have managed to do a reasonable amount with my time. I perhaps wouldn’t go so far as to say that I’ve made the most of the time, but I can’t be too dissatisfied with what I have managed to do and experience in my half century.
Over that time I’ve made friends, travelled, got married and had a range of work experiences. I’ve had children, immersed myself in a range of community activities and in a small way tried to make a contribution to others. I’ve owned parts of houses (the bank has owned the rest!), owned cars and managed to just about keep my head above water living in one of the most expensive cities in the world. And, of course, I’ve written books and tutored students and written commercially too.
Looking back, I also find I have few regrets. Perhaps, if I had my time over again, I would have liked to take a degree in English. But then, if I had, there’s no guarantee that the other things I’ve done and experienced would have come my way. The thought that my path might then have taken me in quite different directions isn’t one that sits easily with me.
In any case, I’m not a great fan of regret. It usually accompanies a desire to wind back time and do things over. For a start, doing things over is impossible. But even if it were possible, who’s to say that the ultimate outcome would be any better. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. A different path might just lead to different difficulties, for all any of us know.
And besides, life is not over yet. I still have things I want to do and achieve. I’m not just counting the days until retirement (approximately 5,478 days if I’m lucky to live that long and they don’t put the retirement age up!). I want to keep learning, developing, creating and experiencing. Who knows what blessings might come my way?
And so I feel I am quite philosophically fifty – happy to be here and happy to think about all I might see and experience from this point on. I feel grateful without being too self-satisfied. And I’m also grateful for my readers. Thanks for being part of my journey.
Coming soon. . .